Drip Marketing, Marketing Automation, ActiveCampaign, Zoho

Advice To Out-of-Workers: Read This Before You ‘Network’ with Me

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For several months I’ve been asked almost weekly to help someone who’s just lost a paycheck to find their next one. (I don’t say “lost their job” because that’s like saying “work at home mom.” Everyone thinks they’re underpaid while they’re employed. Then when they’re unemployed, they must work to get re-employed…only now there’s no employer-sponsored paycheck. Talk about working for nothing!)

Unemployment is the new social disrupter. Never in my lifetime do I recall so many friends of friends losing their jobs at the same time. So naturally, when viewed at a high-level, you can understand the scarcity mentality that kicks in. It is frightening not to know how you’re going to feed the family and pay the bills. Most people have a fight (urgency or desperation) or flight (denial or flash-frozen) reaction.

Attention Out-of-Workers: Please Note the Following Protocols
Before You ‘Network’ with Me And Ask for My Help

I can’t help but compare some smart, unemployed former executives to what I call the “new-waiter phenomenon.” Have you ever noticed how bad the service can be from a new waiter or waitress? They’ll ask, “What would you like to drink?” and then bring nothing. Or they hover and drive you crazy in the beginning of the meal, and then are MIA when you’re ready for more coffee and the check. It’s as if they’ve never eaten at a restaurant before in their lives!!

Everything these waiters ever knew when they were diners went right out of their heads once they became servers. They’re missing a sensitivity chip (to quote Jennifer Aniston, commenting on a different behavioral change); they’re oblivious to connecting what they liked and what drove them crazy when they were being served to how to take care of their customers. Forget more training: They’re just too focused on themselves and their own discomfort level.

Here’s my point. Contacting everyone you’ve ever known in your life and requesting everyone they know to rally to help you find your next job is recruitment spam. You never cared about me while you were employed; why do you care about me now that you’re not? “Networking” like this may have worked last year or last century, but it’s not going to work in our current environment. There are just too many of you. I have a business to run.

So here’s my advice before you ask for my help.

  1. Build yourself an online reputation aka brand. (If you can’t be personally “googled,” you don’t exist.) Open a free account and spend time on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn giving of yourself to the community. Even if you don’t know how or why yet, just do it.
  2. Open accounts on all the bookmarking and RSS sites: Digg, StumbleUpon, FriendFeed, Feedburner, etc. This will not “get you a job.” This will help you be visible within your field when you comment on other people’s posts.
  3. Create a personal website for yourself to show off your expertise and professional accomplishments, testimonials, recommendations. (No pictures of friends, family, cats and dogs.) Business only. You can use your LinkedIn profile as a “website,” but a standalone website that ties back to your LinkedIn page is more impressive.
  4. Blog regularly. As a prospective employer, I’ll learn a lot more about who you are on your website and blog than I’ll ever know reading your resume and interviewing you. That helps me reduce the risk factor in hiring you–or interviewing you.
  5. Offer to VOLUNTEER for social media projects, copywriting assignments or project management with respected employers in your field. In the old days we called this “working on spec.” There are only so many jobs to go around right now. What are you willing to do to stand out from your out-of-work competitors? Volunteering your expertise puts you on the hiring radar and gets you visibility on great projects. (I just referred one of my volunteer copywriters to a paid position with a client because I knew and trusted her work.)
  6. When you contact me, show me that you know who I am, and respect my time. Why do I get asked for help so often? Because I am known. I’ve earned an online (and offline) reputation as a business connector. I already do all the things I’m suggesting you do. I’ve invested many unpaid hours of my own time to research, understand and master personal branding. When you call to “pick my brain,” I take offense. This brain is not free. Offer to do something for me. Money may be tight for you, and I don’t have time to “go to breakfast” (plus, if you read my blog you’d know I’m not a morning person). But I’d be impressed if you read my blog, then commented or submitted one of my posts to a social media site.

Before you ask me to go to work for you, go to work for yourself. When you’ve implemented the suggestions above, I’m more receptive to helping you connect with your next job opportunity (I’ve connected 4 people to new jobs in the last 12 months, so I do have an influential network.)

But I don’t have time or inclination to work with job-seeking networking spammers. Heed the lesson of the online social networkers: “It’s the relationship, stupid.” You won’t stay unemployed forever. But the work you put into documenting your accomplishments online and taking an interest in others in your field are a long-term investment in you.


  1. Right on, sister!. Preach it! It IS about the relationship! Many folks would do well to read The Go Giver by Bob Burg and ask themselves, “How have I given…to those I now ask to give?” I’d like to help as many folks as I can, but “networking” didn’t exist to some a few days, weeks, or months ago.

    Joe High

  2. Great article. And quite true. You offered excellent advice. I’ve just sent out a “tweat” pointing to this blog. Right now, it’s extremely pertinent.

    Pat Egen

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